Female body hair, what is normal? It all is babe, it all is.
I’m one to listen to the various opinions of important people in my life. I’m naturally a people pleaser, and I always want to make everyone happy, but I just recently began learning that that isn’t always possible.
So naturally, when the idea to grow my armpit hair out entered my mind, I had to
ask the people that mattered most in my life what they thought. Naturally, I got a mixture of responses, with the majority of people telling me that the idea was gross...and that I would “look like a man.”
Honestly, the response was quite disheartening. It made me sad to realize just how much society has ingrained in our minds that women having body hair is appalling and seen us unnatural– which is TOTAL B.S.!
It made me even more sad when I heard my boyfriend’s thoughts after I asked him what he’d think if I grew out my armpit hair. “Are you serious?” he asked me, “yes,” I replied. He paused and closed his eyes, squirming in what seemed like disgust and unpleasantness, at the thought of me with armpit hair.
“No. Please. Don’t do it. You’ll look like a man.”
His response made me sad. I mean...out of all the people in my life...isn’t he supposed to support me? "You'll look like a man." Isn’t he supposed to encourage me? I reminded myself that his view was based on what society has brought him, and many others up to believe–that women shouldn’t have hair anywhere other than their heads. If you've ever pondered the question "female body hair, what is normal?" I am here to tell you that it ALL is, babe! Every last bit of it.
Going back to not being able to please everyone. It’s true, you can’t do it. Someone is ALWAYS not going to like what you do. Not too long ago I was listening to one of my favorite podcasts, The Mindset Mentor, by Rob Dial–in his podcast series he really tries to help you build a better mindset...I hadn’t realized just how much control I had over my mind until I started listening to his stuff!
He has this one episode about not caring about what other people think about
you...and it was a tough one for me to listen to because it made me realize just how dumb it is to care about what insignificant people have to say–side-note, I feel mean calling people insignificant...but I mean for the sake of your mind...some opinions really have to be deemed insignificant.
Anyway, he advised me–and many of his listeners–to make a physical list of people whose opinions actually matter. I did it. And I realized that my list was pretty small. And I bet you yours probably is too...and if it’s not, I say, go back and really dig deep. Whose opinions ACTUALLY matter.
While many of the people I’d asked if I should grow my armpit hair were on my list, I came to the conclusion that, in this particular scenario, it didn’t matter what they thought because growing out my armpit hair is more than making a statement to me. To me, it’s about freedom. It’s about embracing my natural beauty. I am guilty of punching into google "female body hair what is normal" before! I did it. I've done it. I wanted to know the answer. And babe, once again I will tell you it all is. Freaking embrace it, it's you, and you, you are the best!
Think about it. Did, god...the universe...or some higher power put us on this earth with hot wax, Gillette razors, shaving cream, and hair laser removal?
The answer is no.
Shaving our hair is something society has told us to do...and now look! They’re making millions of dollars, if not BILLIONS, of dollars off of this acquired belief–that women need to be silky smooth in order to be sexy. They're the jerks making us so insecure about ourselves that we take to Google asking silly questions like "female body hair what is normal"–Another side-note but...can we just stop and think about how much waste this industry creates too? With the single-use disposable razors, the premade waxing strips, the non-premade waxing strips, the shaving creams, foams and moisturizers, and plastic replaceable razor heads. That’s a lot of waste–sorry, that was a bit of my eco-friendly side seeping through, back to hairy pitties.
I love embracing my natural beauty. I do. And honestly, part of me has always felt like I am not embracing this “hippie”–for lack of a better word–side of myself.
I am in tune with nature, my surroundings, my vibrations, and others’ vibrations. I burn incense, practice yoga and I meditate.
I mean to be completely honest...I sometimes want to dread my hair.–The hair on top of my head to be clear...not any other hair or hairs.
Sometimes I feel like this is naturally the next step for me. That in order to even be more in-tune with myself I have to grow out my armpit hair.
As I am typing this out, I am wondering why I haven’t taken the leap already. Why haven’t I just said “Eff it. I don’t care what others think of me.” And honestly, I think that there is still a part of me that is wondering what others will think.
I truly dislike that about myself, but hey, nobody is perfect.
We are all a work in progress, but I will never ask Google again "female body hair what is normal?!"
I will do it, and I will overcome this inherent need to please everyone. And I will never type into a search engine "female body hair what is normal" ever again. I have come to terms that it's all normal, and that it is all beautiful, it's our truest self.
This journey to grow my armpit hair out will be one of learning to let go of insignificant people’s opinions, of being so insecure about something I had to Google it! If I can do this, and completely overcome my fear of what others think of my hairy pits...then I think I’ll feel liberated. Strong. Empowered.
I will do it, and I will overcome this inherent need to please everyone.
How to overcome the fear of being judged
See, my brain, it’s doing it right now. It wants to give me the list of 5 million reasons why I shouldn’t grow my armpit hair out, instilling fear in me...but the thing is...there are always five million reasons not to do something.
Because as human beings we naturally have fears. Fears are what kept us alive hundreds of years ago. Fears allowed us to stay alive, and not do anything that might pose a risk to our wellbeing. But the thing is, we’re not there anymore.
We don’t live in caves, the majority of us don’t hunt, forage, or grow our own food. We have evolved. And that’s the thing isn’t it, evolution. If we have evolved to believe that hairy women are gross...then can we evolve to unlearn such a silly societal mindset?
The answer is yes.
We can unlearn the belief that body hair, or an excess of it is not normal, that it's not beautiful
It just takes a few people with loud voices to make a change.
My parents always said I was loud. I think growing up in a Latin and Hispanic household will do that to you. But am I loud enough? Loud enough to stand up to a mindset we’ve been told isn’t a mindset, but is normal.
I am not too sure. At the end of the day for me...this is about embracing my natural beauty, building my self-confidence, and learning to not care what other people think about me.
While my voice might not be loud enough to start a movement…#HairyHuns or #HotnHairy.
It might be loud enough to show you that there is beauty to it–hairy pitties. And that you don’t have to love it...but that you shouldn’t hate or be disgusted by the girls who choose not to shave their underarms.
There is no reason to be mean. There is no reason to hate. Our planet does not need any more negativity than is already on it.
Instead, we can be progressive and embrace something that’s actually normal but has been deemed unnatural. Alright, one last time before I leave you..."Female body hair, what is normal?"
-Veronica Beltran recently joined the Modern Match Lingerie Team. Veronica has been a vegan for three years and has a passion to help inspire others through her social media to take the leap into the #plantbased world. While advocating for animal rights, she also advocates for the environment.
YouTube: Veronica Belle